


Relay is a Four-Letter Word (or, Rin and Sousuke: the Sano Years)

by bryoneybrynn



Category: Free!
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Pre-Slash, SouRin Week, sano years, sourin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-19
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-21 14:29:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4832669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bryoneybrynn/pseuds/bryoneybrynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>And then one afternoon as they are walking home from practice, Rin tells Sousuke he’s transferring to Iwatobi. Just like that.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Relay is a Four-Letter Word (or, Rin and Sousuke: the Sano Years)

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is the first of 3 stories tracing the path of Rin and Sousuke’s friendship/relationship. I had hoped to do at least the first two parts for Sourin week but this first part grew longer than I anticipated and I ran out of time. So here is installment one: The Sano Elementary Years. Canon events and sections of dialogue are taken from both Free: Eternal Summer! (subbed version on Crunchyroll) and the High Speed light novel. 
> 
> Prompt: Day One: Rock - Sano Elementary

Relay is a Four-Letter Word (or, Rin and Sousuke: the Sano Years)

Rin is sitting in a blossoming cherry tree just outside the school grounds the first time Sousuke sees him. Sousuke doesn’t know who he is, of course, not yet. He’s just a red-haired boy in a tree, but he catches Sousuke’s eye all the same. He is laughing and saying something in an animated manner to the man and woman standing with him. Sousuke guesses they are his parents – the woman has the same red hair and the man has the same big smile. There is a girl, too, with matching smile and red hair. Sousuke watches them, amazed by the boy’s big gestures – he has never seen anyone gesture like that before – but it’s not only that. There’s just something about him, sitting in the pink blossoms with his red hair, his arms and legs moving as he talks, his laugh clear enough to carry over to where Sousuke stands watching. 

Sousuke can’t tear his eyes away. 

Then the bell chimes and the boy is jumping out of the tree, waving madly to his parents before grabbing the girl’s hand and dashing towards the school. Sousuke follows but loses track of them when they round the corner of the building ahead of him. 

Unsurprisingly, Sousuke gets a bit lost trying to find his classroom. He is new to the school and hopelessly confused about where he is going. Everyone else seems to know exactly where they need to be, quickly disappearing into their respective rooms. Sousuke wishes there were signs pointing the way for grade twos. 

Fortunately, one of the older students notices him, confused and out of place in the rapidly emptying hallway. She walks him to his classroom, even waving his teacher over before saying good-bye and hurrying off to her own class. He whispers his thanks, but he doubts she hears him. 

Before he’s even had a chance to get his bearings, the teacher is ushering him to the front of the room and asking him to introduce himself to the class. This is the part he has been dreading, everyone looking at him, the new kid, all trying to figure out if he’s weird or if he’s okay. Eyes on the floor, he mumbles his name, tells them how his family just moved from Aomori. The class calls a welcome to him in unison. His teacher points out an empty seat near the back of the room. It is only when he looks towards the indicated seat that Sousuke sees the red-haired boy sitting there. 

The boy smiles at him the entire time it takes Sousuke to walk to his seat. No sooner than he is seated, the boy is turning sideways in his chair, his smile hitching even wider.

“Hi, I’m Rin! I have a girly name, but I’m a boy. Welcome to Sano Elementary.”

The introduction seems a bit bizarre to Sousuke but he’s only half-listening anyway, too drawn in by Rin’s brilliant smile to pay attention to much else. Up at the front of the room, the teacher has started with the day’s announcements. It takes a moment for Sousuke to realize he needs to pay attention. He faces front, tries to focus on what the teacher is saying, but from the corner of his eye he can see Rin’s smile and it distracts him.

***

Over the coming weeks and months, Sousuke learns lots about Rin. He learns that Rin is seven years old, that he has a little sister named Gou, that his father is a fisherman, that his favourite candy is mango gummies, his favourite cartoon is One-Piece, and that what he wants to be more than anything when he grows up is a famous explorer. And he learns that Rin likes to compete about _everything_. Whether it’s who gets the last popsicle, which movie they’re going to watch on a rainy afternoon, or who gets to go first down the slide, it’s a competition.

He also learns that Rin likes to talk a _lot_. That’s okay, though, because Sousuke likes listening to him. Rin tells great stories. He has a wild ideas and is so enthusiastic about everything. Except, of course, when he’s not, but then his disdain is just as animated as his enthusiasm. Sousuke loves watching Rin’s face when he gets going. It’s almost like watching a cartoon; all of his reactions are so big. The only downside is that when Rin gets upset, he gets really upset. The other kids tease him about this and call him a crybaby, but Sousuke never does. He doesn’t like seeing Rin cry.

Mostly, though, it’s not an issue because usually Rin is happy, and so Sousuke is usually happy, too.

It doesn’t take long before they are inseparable. By the time the first term of school is over, they are the very best of friends and Sousuke can’t remember his life without Rin.

In the second term, though, everything changes.

***

At first Rin cries all the time. Not just in the days immediately following his father’s death – the visitations, the funeral, the cremation, all those times when everyone cries – but for months and months. All through the rest of grade two and into grade three, Rin often bursts into tears for no reason. For a while, the kids in their class are understanding. Later, after months have gone by and it shows no sign of stopping, they make fun of him behind his back. They don’t make fun of him to his face, though. One of them tried it once and Sousuke laid him flat, left him with a split lip to serve as a reminder for him and a warning for everyone else: you mess with Rin, you mess with Sousuke.

The adults all seem worried. There are lots of hushed conversations and _looks_ exchanged between them whenever Rin is found sobbing again. 

The grade three crawls by like this. Summer gives way to fall gives way to winter and Rin shows no signs of feeling better. He and Sousuke play together almost every day but Rin’s fire is gone. His hands hang limp at his sides when he talks. His expression is so flat, his face almost seems like a mask. He doesn’t tell stories. He doesn’t even compete anymore. If Sousuke wants something, Rin lets him have it with a shrug. If they start to argue about something, Rin abandons the conversation, withdrawing into a silence that can last minutes or hours. 

As the spring comes on, even Sousuke starts to wonder if maybe something is wrong, if maybe it is more than just being sad because his dad is gone. 

But then, one day as grade three is winding down, Rin’s tears seem to dry up. He comes to school smiling one morning, and then again the next morning, and the next. A week goes by, then two, and Rin hasn’t cried once. Sousuke starts to think maybe the worst of it is past. Maybe Rin is starting to feel better. His heart feels happy at the thought. 

The happiness is short-lived, however. Only a few days after he’d let himself start to relax, Sousuke gets his first hint that maybe Rin’s change in mood is not quite what it appears.

It is the second last day before school ends and Rin is positively humming with energy. The moment school lets out, Rin grabs Sousuke by the hand, dragging him up the street with impatient shouts of “Come on!” and “Hurry up, Sousuke!” He doesn’t stop until they are standing in front of a square concrete building with a large mural of brightly coloured fish painted on the outside. Sousuke looks at the sign above the door. _Sano Swim Club._ He looks at Rin. 

Rin’s face is _glowing_. 

Sousuke just stares, confused. He’s not sure what he’s supposed to be excited about. 

Rin huffs in exasperation but he can’t keep the grin off his face. He’s practically vibrating in his eagerness. “Did you know that before my dad was a fisherman what he wanted more than anything was to be an Olympic swimmer?”

At the mention of Rin’s father, Sousuke shoulders hunch and he prepares himself for Rin’s tears. But they don’t come. Rin’s eyes are dry. It should be encouraging, but it’s not. Sousuke’s gut tells him something is off. 

He gives Rin a doubtful look. “Swimming?”

Rin nods. “I thought maybe we could try it, see if it’s fun.”

Sousuke finds it unlikely that swimming for a club will be all that fun. He’s swum before, of course, but he doesn’t think it’s something he wants to do every day. And he doesn’t like all this stuff about Rin’s dad. He can’t say why, but it makes his stomach twist up in knots. 

But Rin is looking at him with shining eyes, bouncing up and down on his toes, and he’s still holding on to Sousuke’s hand. 

Sousuke sighs and rolls his eyes. “Fine, let’s go check it out.”

***

Sousuke is surprised to find swimming is fun, lots of fun, even. And not just because he gets to spend more time with Rin. He actually likes it. He seems to be good at it, too, his body taking to it like swimming was as natural as walking. He likes the way it feels to dive into the water, plunging deep to the bottom of the pool. He likes the way it feels to tuck his knees up into his body and float, just a ball bobbing in the water. And he especially likes the way it feels to propel himself through the water, arms and legs working hard, pushing him forward, fast, fast, fast.

Of course, Rin’s good at it, too, which means Rin turns it into a competition in that way that he turns everything into a competition. Not that Sousuke’s going to complain; he likes the competition, too. That, and it seems like a good sign that Rin’s competitive nature has resurfaced. Plus there’s the fact that swimming with Rin is just plain fun. They’re well-matched, and they have to work hard to keep up with each other. Often Sousuke wins, but just as often he doesn’t. 

Sano Swim Club has an indoor pool, which means they get to keep swimming even as fall comes on and the air turns cold. All through the autumn and winter, he and Rin swim more days than not, getting stronger and faster. They take part in a few local swim meets, winning them easily. Their only real competition is each other. Well, except for that one time they swam against the Iwatobi Swim Club; there was a kid on that team who was fast, really fast. Sousuke was sure Rin would cry when he lost to him, but Rin surprised him not only by keeping it together, but also by being excited to see another fast swimmer their age. Rin wanted to go meet the kid but Sousuke didn’t think the guy looked that friendly and steered him away.

By the time spring comes again, Sousuke can’t believe he ever thought swimming could be boring. Being at the pool, swimming with Rin, has become the best part of his day, hands down.

Then comes the day their coach introduces them to the butterfly and everything gets even _better_. 

He and Rin had been waiting eagerly for butterfly. They have already learned backstroke, front crawl, breaststroke. Rin has already boasted he’ll be better at butterfly than Sousuke and Sousuke can’t wait to prove him wrong. 

The coach gathers them around the poolside. 

“We’re starting butterfly today,” he tells them and Rin’s hand grabs at Sousuke’s forearm, fingers digging in hard with excitement. “This stroke isn’t for everyone. It is the most challenging of all the styles. It not only requires strength but technique. To specialize in butterfly, your form must be perfect.”

Sousuke makes an effort not to roll his eyes. Sometimes he thinks Coach Ichida must be related to Rin; they both love to make exaggerated speeches. Still, he can’t help his growing excitement. He knows he is strong. He’s the strongest of his age-mates on the team, even stronger than some of the older kids. And his technique is good; the coach has told him so lots of times.

Coach Ichida gets in the pool, does a length to show them the stroke, and then breaks it down for them, demonstrating the correct movement and form. Watching him, Sousuke feels his impatience growing. He wants to be in the water. Beside him, Rin seems to be of a similar mind. He keeps shifting around, fidgeting with his swim cap and goggles. When the coach finally waves them into the pool, Rin is a blur, hitting the water before Sousuke has even started to move.

By the time the lesson ends, Sousuke is tired and sore and in love. The gleam he sees in Rin’s eyes lets him know his best friend feels exactly the same way.

***

For a while it is good. Summer rolls by, full of smiles and stories and swimming. Rin has his fire back, his face is alive again. He hasn’t mentioned his dad in a long time, not since that first day at the swim club. He seems to be back to his old self and _they_ seem to be back to how they were before. They go to school, they hang out, they laugh, they argue. They swim. They swim butterfly, especially. They compete incessantly. Fly has become their favourite way to settle arguments. Summer gives way to fall, the months tick by. Most of the time, Rin seems happy and so Sousuke is happy most of the time, too.

But then, one cold blustery day shortly after Rin’s eleventh birthday, Rin shows up at practice and there is an energy to him that Sousuke doesn’t like. Though Rin’s smile is as wide as ever, it’s a bit too wide and his eyes are too bright. He’s sped up, too, all his movements faster than usual, like someone put him on fast forward. In the locker room, he’s changed into his swimsuit before Sousuke has even managed to get his shoes off. 

Sousuke starts changing and is nearly knocked over when Rin jumps on him. 

“Come on, Sou!” Rin shouts, laughing. “You’re so slow!”

“I’d be faster if you’d get off me,” he points out, but Rin only laughs again. “What’s with you, anyway?”

“Nothing,” Rin says. He slides off Sousuke’s back and sprawls out on a nearby bench. “I just want to get in there. I want to talk to Coach Ichida.”

“About what?”

“About _relay_.”

Sousuke looks around at the reverential tone in Rin’s voice. His friend’s face is shining in a way that makes the hairs rise on the back of Sousuke’s neck. Rin has an almost dreamy expression and he’s still smiling that weird smile.

“I want to start a relay team,” Rin continues. “You and me and I’m thinking maybe Hiroshi and Benjiro.”

Pulling on his swimsuit, Sousuke shakes his head. “That doesn’t even make sense. You and I can’t be on a team together. We both swim fly.”

Rin makes an impatient noise in the back of his throat. “Doesn’t matter. I’ll do crawl or you can do back or something. It doesn’t matter what stroke we swim. It just matters that we swim together.”

They head out to the pool. Rin immediately zeroes in on the coach. Sousuke dives in the water and begins his warm-up. He’s sure Rin will tell him all about what Coach Ichida has to say.

Which is exactly what Rin does a couple hours later when they are walking home from practice. Rin prattles on about relay the whole way and Sousuke can’t say he likes much of what he hears. Rin tells him all about his father’s experience of swimming as part of the Iwatobi Swim Club and swimming relay with his friends. He hears about how the memory of it had stayed bright throughout Rin’s father’s years, one of his most shining moments, swimming together with his friends. Rin’s eyes are fever-bright as he tells Sousuke about how he wants to experience the same thing, how he wants to know what his father felt. How he hopes, maybe, if he can get there, if he can reach that place in his heart, he’ll be able to connect with those long forgotten memories of his dad. Maybe he’ll be able to see his father’s face again.

Rin stops walking, so Sousuke stops, too. He turns to look at Rin and sees a burning intensity in his friend’s eyes. 

“I need you on the team,” Rin says. He steps in close, and his hand grasps Sousuke’s wrist. “You’re our strongest swimmer and you’re my best friend. I can’t do this without you.” Rin’s eyes gleam wetly but his fierce expression doesn’t waver. “Please, Sou.”

Watching the tears slip from his friend’s eyes, Sousuke doesn’t know what to say. He remembers what Rin had said about his father that very first time they stood outside the Sano SC, and he has the sudden thought that Rin had been planning this from the start. That this was the real reason he joined the swim club. That he’d just been waiting until they were old enough, until they’d learned all the strokes, and could take part in a medley relay. Sousuke’s stomach lurches and he looks away.

It’s a bad idea, all of it, and he finds himself wishing they’d never joined the stupid swim club. He never would have if he’d known this was what Rin had in mind. He just knows it’s not going to go well and then Rin is going to go back to being like he was before, flat and sad and crying all the time. There’s no way this can work out the way Rin wants it, too. Sousuke is sure of that. You can’t replace a parent with a swim race.

In the end, though, he just nods his head. Because Rin is his best friend. Sousuke never could say no to him. 

He meets Rin’s watery gaze. “I’m swimming fly,” he says.

Rin laughs and launches himself at Sousuke, arms winding tight around Sousuke’s neck, his wet cheeks pressed against Sousuke’s own. Sousuke hugs him back, but he can’t shake the bad feeling he has about relay.

***

Sousuke’s bad feeling proves itself true almost immediately. Starting the very next day, Rin throws himself into training for the relay with a kind of frantic single-mindedness, and over the next few months, Sousuke watches as Rin works himself nearly to the point of breaking. Every spare moment he’s in the pool, or, if he can’t be in the pool, he’s on the computer, reading about relay, watching videos of relay, poring over every last scrap of information. They don’t hang out anymore. They don’t watch movies or play games. Soccer, basketball, video games, cards, all of it is forgotten in the wake of Rin’s obsession. With every day that passes, Rin seems a bit more frenzied, a bit more desperate.

Sousuke keeps waiting for an adult to step in and say something but no one does. Rin’s mom barely notices. Ever since Rin’s dad died, she’s barely noticed anything. When Rin tells her all about his plan, Sousuke there by his side, she only sits and stares at them with flat, red-rimmed eyes. Their teachers barely listen to his talk of relay, too used to tuning out his admittedly overwhelming chatter to see that what he is saying is nonsense. Their swim coach, well, Ichida’s is a bit of an idiot, to be honest. Sousuke’s pretty sure the man doesn’t even know Rin’s dad is dead. He’s only too happy to let Rin have his relay. Rin’s one of his best swimmers, after all, and a relay win would look good for the swim club. 

So Rin studies and practices and studies and practices and Sousuke does it with him because that’s what best friends do. But each day he feels a bit less sure that he’s doing the right thing. Each day the bad feeling in the pit of his stomach grows stronger. He finds himself wishing the next tournament would hurry up and come already so they can swim and lose and then maybe Rin will let go of this fantasy. Because even if Rin goes back to crying, Sousuke’s pretty sure it has to be better for him than this.

***

He gets his wish. The day of tournament comes. They swim. They lose. They weren’t even close, in fact, and Sousuke is sure Rin didn’t find what he was looking for in that pool. He glances at Rin, waiting for the tears, waiting for the signal that this whole stupid thing can finally be over. He doesn’t want Rin to be sad, but he’d take sad-but-real Rin over in-denial-relay-monster Rin any day.

But Rin doesn’t cry. 

“It sucks that we lost, but that was pretty good for our first relay as team,” Rin says, his voice bright and upbeat. “So let’s use this as motivation to –”

And just like that, Sousuke can see it. Rin is not going to accept the truth about the situation. He will not see how pointless it is to go searching for his dad at the bottom of a pool. No amount of losses will make Rin give up on his dream. He will just keep trying, just keep hoping.

Rin is never going to stop, so Sousuke does the only thing he can think to do. He stops for him.

“Forget it,” he says, cutting Rin off mid-sentence. “The relay’s not for me.”

Even through all the noise and chaos around them, Sousuke can hear Rin’s sharp intake of breath. He glances up to see Rin is looking at him like Sousuke’s just said he hates birthdays or kittens or something equally unfathomable. 

Sousuke pushes on. “I don’t like losing ‘cause someone else messed up,” he says, offering up the first excuse that comes to mind. “Or having to share a win with everyone else. That’s boring to me.”

Rin comes at him then. They fight about it right there beside the pool. They fight about it again in the locker room. Over the next few weeks they fight about it again and again. 

Rin keeps pushing, trying to get Sousuke to join him, to share his dream. Sousuke keeps holding to the line that he is an individual swimmer. He can see that it hurts Rin, believing that his best friend cares more about winning as an individual than swimming together, but Sousuke figures that’s better than the truth. Better that Rin think that than know Sousuke thinks his dream is hopeless. Better that than forcing Rin to see how crazy he’s been the last few months. Better than having to be the one who makes Rin realize that he’s never going to see his dad again.

***

For a while it seems like his plan has worked. Rin stops pestering Sousuke about relay, stops talking about relay altogether. Rin’s black mood lifts and he’s back to his usual animated self. They go back to swimming fly, racing each other at the swim club each day after school. It seems like everything is going fine.

And then one afternoon as they are walking home from practice, Rin tells Sousuke he’s transferring to Iwatobi. Just like that.

“I’ve found some guys I want to swim relay with,” he says, excitement plain in his voice, and Sousuke swears his heart actually stops. 

Sousuke looks at Rin, sees his broad smile, and realizes how stupid he’s been. How could he have thought that him quitting the relay team would be enough to stop Rin? How could he have thought Rin wouldn’t push on without him? How could he have not guessed that Rin would just find someone else to swim with? 

How could he have thought himself that important?

It seems so obvious now, so obvious and so stupid. He is stupid and Rin is stupid and the whole situation is so _stupid_ he wants to scream. Sousuke clenches his teeth hard against the words, all the mean, angry words that want to come out. 

Rin doesn’t seem to notice. He keeps rattling on as if he hasn’t just smashed Sousuke’s heart to pulp. 

A few weeks later, Rin is gone. They still see each other sometimes after school or get together on the weekends, maybe, but it isn’t the same. Rin isn’t in his world anymore. They can’t talk about what happened at school, because Rin goes to a new school now. They can’t laugh about all the dumb things Coach Ichida said at practice because Rin wasn’t there. They can’t argue about who’s going to swim fly for Sano SC at the next tournament, because Rin doesn’t swim for Sano anymore. Even their throwdowns are disappointing, always rock, paper, scissors instead of fly.

Not to mention that Rin doesn’t seem to care about school, or Sano SC, or anything from his old life anymore. All Rin can talk about is his new teammates, his new friends, and one in particular. It’s the fast kid they sometimes saw at tournaments, Nanase Haruka. Every other word out of Rin’s mouth seems to be about the guy and it’s all Sousuke can do not to tell him to shut up. He can’t stand the way Rin’s face lights up when he talks about him, can barely look at his shining eyes and rapt expression. He tries to remind himself that Rin doesn’t know he’s hurting Sousuke when he goes on and on about his new teammates. He doesn’t know the real reason Sousuke walked away from relay. As far as Rin knows, he has no desire to swim relay at all, and certainly not with Rin.

But even knowing that Rin has no idea doesn’t keep it from hurting and sometimes Sousuke finds himself cutting their visits short. Sometimes he tells Rin that he’s busy doing chores or that he’s got too much homework to hang out. When he does this, he can tell that Rin is unhappy, but Sousuke figures that’s only fair. He’s pretty much unhappy all the time. 

Then, just when Sousuke thinks things can’t get any worse, the bottom falls out of his world.

***

“Australia?”

Rin nods. “Yes, Australia.” 

Sousuke’s brows lower, knit together in confusion. He knows what it is, where it is, but still, Sousuke can’t make any sense of the word. He opens his mouth to ask Rin again, but nothing comes out. His head is full of buzzing, like a thousand bees have swarmed his skull.

It is late Saturday morning and they are in Rin’s bedroom, playing video games. It’s the first time they’ve done this in a while, spent a whole day together. Sousuke had been embarrassingly happy when he’d gotten the invitation. He hadn’t realized that Rin had an ulterior motive for inviting him over. He’d thought they were just going to hang out, like they used to, before relay and Nanase ruined everything.

But now... Now….

His eyes flick up to look at Rin. Rin is watching him closely, presumably trying to gage his reaction. But Sousuke has no reaction to give him. At Rin’s pronouncement, everything in him just ground to a halt. His brain is locked up with white noise. His voice seems to have disappeared. In fact, his whole body seems to have gone off-line. He’s not sure he can even feel his hands, his fingers. 

He’s pretty sure he feels nothing at all.

A full minute of complete silence passes. Sousuke doesn’t move. He doesn’t think he even blinks. It’s hard to tell, though; his eyes feel hot and they sting.

Rin reaches out to take hold of Sousuke’s arm. He gives an odd, nervous laugh. “Say something, Sou,” he says, and he gives Sousuke’s arm a shake.

Sousuke can see Rin’s hand on his arm, but he can’t feel it. It’s almost as though his arm shakes of its own accord.

“Sousuke,” Rin says, his voice louder, and he shakes Sousuke’s arm more forcefully. 

Sousuke’s eyes flash to Rin’s. He sees tears starting there and it snaps him out of his daze.

“Why Australia?” he asks, and if the words come out sounding like they’ve been dragged over broken glass, neither of them mentions it. 

“There’s a great swim school there and they’ve accepted me. They train real athletes, world champions. They can get me closer to my dream.”

“Your dad?” Sousuke asks, even more confused. How will leaving Japan bring Rin closer to his dad?

Rin gives him a strange look and shakes his head. “The Olympics.”

Sousuke tries to ignore the way his stomach clenches at the realization that Rin has a new dream and he didn’t even know, instead trying to focus on the dream itself. As dreams go, it’s a good one, and Rin could do it, even. He’s an amazing swimmer. But leaving everything he knows? Going to Australia? It feels too extreme, too desperate. Like running to Iwatobi wasn’t far enough. Now Rin has to go all the way to Australia to outrun his grief. 

“And your mom is okay with this? With you living in Australia?”

Rin shrugs. “She’s a bit sad. I mean, she’s going to miss me but she understands that I need to do this.”

Sousuke has to wonder about that, about letting a twelve-year-old kid go to a foreign country to chase after his dead father’s dream. He frowns, wondering for what feels like the millionth time if anyone else _sees_ Rin at all or if he is the only one.

Rin misinterprets his frown. “Don’t be sad, Sousuke!” he cries and he throws his arms around Sousuke. 

Sousuke returns the hug, burying his face against Rin’s shoulder for a moment, giving himself a second where he doesn’t have to try to hide his expression. Right or wrong, Rin is happy about this. Sousuke wants to be happy, too, for Rin’s sake.

A moment later, Rin is pushing them both upright so he can look at Sousuke. Rin’s eyes are decidedly watery. “I know it’s far but it’s not like we’ll never see each other again. I’ll be home for holidays and who knows? Maybe one day you’ll come visit me.”

“In Australia?” Sousuke asks doubtfully.

Rin laughs and wipes at his eyes. “Maybe. And I’ll write to you all the time.”

Sousuke just nods. He shifts away from Rin, needing a bit of space to catch his breath. Rin wipes again at his tears and lets out a big sigh. When Sousuke glances over at him, Rin shoots him a grin. He really is excited about this. And if he’s serious about swimming in the Olympics one day, however misguided his reasons are, maybe it even makes sense. 

Sousuke lets out a sigh of his own and tries to push away his bad feelings. 

“So, when do you go?” he asks.

Rin’s grin disappears. He ducks his chin, gives Sousuke a sheepish look. “Three weeks.”

Sousuke blinks. “Three weeks?”

“I just got the acceptance on Thursday,” Rin says quickly, and he scoots closer to Sousuke. “They want me to come right away. They’re coming up to a school holiday, so they want me to be there and get settled during the break. I’m going to stay long enough to swim the relay with Haru and the others and then I leave the next day.”

“You’re still swimming the relay?” Anger rushes up, and Sousuke’s hands curl into fists. He can’t put it into words, but the fact that Rin is staying long enough to swim the relay with the Iwatobi team feels like a betrayal. 

Rin gives him a puzzled look, and says easily, “Of course.”

And Sousuke supposed that response tells him everything he needs to know about where he stands with Rin. 

But three weeks…

He can’t waste them being mad. 

Sousuke shuts down the anger and all the heated thoughts that are swirling in his brain. He forces a smile on face, and reaches for his controller. “Well, if we only have three weeks, we’d better get back to the game. This might be the last time I get to kick your ass for a while.

Rin’s grin comes back full force as he snatches up his own controller. “That’s it, Yamazaki. I’m gonna own you so hard.”

Sousuke just smirks ndt turns his attention to the game. 

They spend the rest of the day playing and laughing. Neither one of them mentions Australia once.

***

Three weeks pass in a heartbeat and before he is even close to ready, Sousuke finds himself standing by the poolside, preparing to swim a relay he never wanted to take part in. After Rin’s big announcement, Sousuke asked his coach if they could do a relay at the tournament and they threw together a team. It isn’t that Sousuke cares about relay but this is his last chance to swim with Rin before he leaves for Australia.

Not that Rin seems to care. They’ve been standing only two lanes apart for the last five minutes and Rin hasn’t even noticed him yet. 

Sousuke has his eyes on Rin, though, watching him interact with his Iwatobi teammates. They are loosely lined up behind the starting block, waiting for the signal to take their places for the race. The big kid is in the front, a quiet but serious look on his face. He has his eyes on the pool and seems to be psyching himself up. Behind him a small blond boy is rocking back and forth on his heels and chattering away to everyone and no one in particular. Next in line is Rin. 

Even from the distance, Sousuke can feel Rin’s excitement. He can see the broad smile, the flashing eyes. Rin’s got that tilt to his chin he gets when his competitive streak is coming on hot and he’s moving constantly. Not the obvious rocking of the blond kid, but restless, fidgeting, playing with edge of his swim cap or the strap of his goggles. Peering around people to see what’s happening in the pool, to look at the scoreboard. And checking on his teammates, of course. He does that a lot, taking a read on them. He seems to be content with what he sees, because his smile never wavers.

And then of course there’s Nanase. He looks the way he always looks at tournaments – bored and indifferent. As if it didn’t matter to him if he raced or not, won or not. That indifference gets under Sousuke’s skin. The guy could show a little enthusiasm, if not for himself then for his team’s sake, at least. 

As Sousuke watches, he sees Rin turn around and say something to Nanase. Rin’s smile turns up a notch as he speaks, and his hand comes up to clasp Nanase’s arm, resting there a moment before releasing him. Nanase doesn’t say anything in reply, instead turning his head to the side, his eyes looking at some far-off point. Sousuke thinks it’s incredibly rude, but Rin just rolls his eyes and laughs before turning back to face the pool. 

Once Rin isn’t looking, though, a small, soft smile curves Nanase’s lips. Seeing it, Sousuke’s stomach goes cold and he looks away.

Thankfully, there’s little time to dwell on Nanase’s stupid smile, because they are getting called to starting positions. As they get into position, Sousuke happens to catch Rin glancing his way. He sees the surprise on Rin’s face but then the back swimmers are jumping in the water and Rin’s attention is back on the pool. 

Sousuke’s attention stays on Rin and his teammates. 

The signal goes and the backstroke swimmers arch into their dives in a blur of stretching bodies and splashing water. 

The Iwatobi team is good, there is no doubt about that. The big kid doing back is strong and builds them a solid lead, hitting the wall well before any other team. Then the blond kid is up and he looks like he should be the weak link, but he’s not. He carves through the water with arms that stretch and stretch. He actually builds on the lead, especially after the turn, and he’s almost to the wall a full body length ahead of anybody else. 

Rin is watching from the starting block, giving his traditional snap of his goggle strap, and then he is diving in. His form is perfect, his entry as smooth as he could have wished for. Sousuke is so busy admiring it, he almost misses his own teammate coming to the wall. He notices just in time and dives in a second behind Rin.

Once he’s in the water, he feels better. This is his comfort zone, the place he shares with Rin. He looks for Rin, two lanes over and just ahead, and swims hard to catch up. There is a familiar feeling to this, to chasing down Rin in the pool, and Sousuke feels himself lightening in response. He swims his best, trying to close the distance between them, and there is a moment when he feels that flare of connection, can feel Rin’s awareness of him. For the space of a few heartbeats, a gasped breath, a rotation of his shoulders, he can feel Rin with him. But then Rin comes to the turn ahead of him and the moment is broken. 

By the time Sousuke makes his own turn, Rin has increased his lead. Sousuke can feel the distance between them growing. Sousuke has swum enough with Rin to know that Rin is outdoing himself. His stroke is strong and sure and his speed is incredible. Probably a personal best. Rin drives forward and reaches the wall well ahead of Sousuke.

Sousuke’s hand finds the wall a few seconds later and he’s barely aware of his teammate diving over his head. Instead, he pulls off his goggles and looks for Rin. Rin’s teammates have pulled him out of the water and are helping him to his feet. Then they seem to turn as one, all cheering on Nanase. 

Sousuke pulls himself out of the water and, almost against his will, turns to watch Nanase’s freestyle swim. Nanase is everything Nanase always is – fast and graceful and effortless. Sousuke can’t deny he’s a beautiful swimmer, that there’s something about him that’s different. Compelling. But that does nothing to take away the twisting in Sousuke’s gut at the sight of seeing his best friend cheering the guy on like _they_ were the one’s who’d known each other since they were seven years old. Like they were the ones who’d spent years swimming, playing, training, dreaming, _being_ together.

The race isn’t even close. Nanase hits the wall full seconds ahead of the next fastest swimmer. Sousuke watches as Rin and his teammates pull Nanase from the water and then they are all coming together in a giant group hug. They are cheering and laughing and Sousuke can tell Rin is crying, his eyes too bright, his laugh too ragged. But judging from the look on his face, they are tears of joy. Everything about Rin telegraphs nothing but joy and Sousuke has to look away. 

Sousuke waits long enough for his own teammate to hop out of the pool. They look up at the scoreboard. Their result is dismal – sixth place – but Sousuke couldn’t care less. He’s much more concerned with getting away from Rin and his Iwatobi teammates as quickly as possible. Because he doesn’t think he can stand to be around them a second longer, to have it shoved in his face that Rin was able to find with Nanase Haruka what he could not find with Sousuke.

***

It is early the next morning when Sousuke’s alarm goes off, _really early_ , and he still feels completely wrung out from all the emotion of the day before. He wants nothing more than to stay in bed and sleep the whole day away, but Rin told him he was catching the bus to the airport at six and Sousuke has to see him one more time. He can’t let that scene at the relay be his last moment with Rin.

He finds Rin standing at the bus stop with his mother. She is busy with her phone and barely glances at Sousuke when he walks up. Rin, though, gives him a huge smile, and, seeing it, Sousuke is so glad he made the effort to get up and be here for this.

“Sousuke!” Rin cries as Sousuke nears. “What are you doing here?”

“Came to see you off, of course. Couldn’t let you go to Australia without saying good-bye.”

Rin’s smile falters a little and his eyes get suspiciously shiny. And though Sousuke’s seen Rin’s tears a thousand times before, he finds his own throat tightening in response. 

Sousuke shoves his hands in his coat pockets and clears his throat. Rin gives a little laugh, but it is strained, and Sousuke doesn’t miss the tear that slips down Rin’s cheek.

He steps closer to Rin, bumps Rin’s shoulder with his own. “Congratulations on your win yesterday, by the way.” 

He doesn’t want to say it, doesn’t want to think about the relay at all, but he also doesn’t want the two of them to stand there and cry like idiots, and he’s pretty sure this will distract Rin from any gloomy thoughts. 

Sure enough, Rin’s smile grows stronger and he blinks back his tears. “Thanks! It was so amazing. My dad was so right. Swimming with a team, with the best team, with your friends, it’s just –” He breaks off, hands waving in the air as he tries to find the right word. “I don’t know. It was just so _great_.”

Sousuke nods and makes sure to smile. “I’m glad you found what you were looking for.”

Rin’s smile softens. “Thanks, Sousuke.” 

Something about that smile feels a little too understanding and Sousuke glances away, lets his gaze drift out to the brightening sky and the morning birds that call to each other as they wing past gold-limned clouds. He and Rin lapse into a heavy silence, weighted with the sadness they are both trying hard not to acknowledge. Sousuke’s throat is feeling tight again and his eyes are starting to sting and he doesn’t dare look at Rin because if he looks at Rin, he knows he’ll cry for sure. 

This time it is Rin who saves them when he knocks the toe of his boot into Sousuke’s and asks, “What about that promise?”

It takes a few seconds for Sousuke to figure out that Rin is talking about that throwdown they never made good on and Rin’s promise to do any one thing Sousuke wants him to. 

At the memory, a flood of requests rushes forward in his mind.

_Promise me you won’t forget me._

_Promise me you’ll write every day._

_Promise me you’ll come home again._

_Promise me we’ll see each other again._

_Promise me you won’t get lost in your sadness over there._

_Promise me you won’t pretend to be okay if you’re not._

_Promise me you’ll ask for help if you need it._

_Promise me you’ll ask_ me _for help if you need it._

_Promise me we’ll always be friends._

_Promise me we’ll always be_ best _friends._

_Promise me you don’t love Nanase more than you love me._

But he knows he can’t say any of them, especially not the last one. So he just laughs and says, “Oh, I totally forgot. I still haven’t thought of anything.”

Rin tsks. “Aw, come on.”

There’s no chance to come up with a better answer, though, because Rin’s bus has rounded the corner. Around them, people are gathering up bags and backpacks, shuffling into line.

Sousuke refuses to look at the bus that will take Rin away from him. Instead, he focuses on his friend. His very best friend who feels so much and gestures so big and has such a wild imagination and such a passionate heart and who he can’t imagine living without. But he’s going to have to. Somehow he’s going to have to.

“I guess I’ll look forward to asking you next time we meet,” Sousuke says, and finds that he likes that. He likes that the promise is still between them, still unfulfilled. He likes the expectation that there will be a chance to fulfill it another time because they will see each other again. 

Rin nods, seeming to accept this, and Sousuke thinks maybe Rin likes still having the promise between them, too.

Rin looks at Sousuke. His eyes are dry and he is smiling, and Sousuke knows he is trying hard, trying to let his smile and clear eyes say, “This is no big deal. There’s nothing to frown or cry about. We’ll see each other soon.” What he actually says, though, is, “See you around.”

“Yeah,” Sousuke says with a dry-eyed smile of his own, because “see you around” is a million times better than “good-bye” and if Rin wants to do this casual and happy, then Sousuke will do this casual and happy, too. Rin is his best friend. Sousuke never could say no to him.

Rin holds a fist out to Sousuke. Sousuke bumps it with his own. They will see each other again. He knows they will.

End


End file.
